I was in the shower the other day, after a long walk* on a cold day. I cranked the heat up a bit, rewarming myself, and even though it wasn't that hot, the contrast was... vaguely uncomfortable, a little weird. That's how the past 9 months have felt. Everything is weird and awkward and even the good feels a little off.
[*immediate side bar: I had my routines all in place pre-pandemic, and
those were all thrown out the window in March. All the classes I took, save one, done; my gym, closed; alone time, what's that? So one weekend in the late spring/early summer, I grabbed some hydration and set off down the trail. And I walked. And walked. And walked. I covered about 4 miles that day, and it felt amazing to be on my own, to move; so I kept doing it. Now I walk 5-6 miles almost every Sunday. Its always worth it. But I still miss my gym. Hopefully opening soon, and then weights, here I come.]
Hi. I posted something in October and said I would be right back. I wasn't. Sorry!
Here it is, just moments from Christmas, and then (hallelujah) the New Year. I'm ready to see the back of 2020. I'm tired, my anxiety and depression are kicking my ass, I'm overwhelmed, and I'm ready for a 3 month nap. I'm throwing all this out there because I'm craving openness and honesty, but please don't mistake this for an invitation to talk about it. I have no interest. I know you're here for me, thank you.
(Sorry, these photos are in no order at all...)
Putting that aside, we're doing okay. Gwen, despite some struggles, is doing so well with virtual schooling. I'm so impressed with her responsibility and ownership; though we're all hoping she'll be able to head back to in-person in January. Travis is working as hard as always, despite a very scaled back event schedule. He and Gwen are excited about the ski season... COVID restrictions means way less people on the slopes, which is a little plus. Daisy's foot tumor grew back, but then responded really well to a combination of topical steroids and oral anti-histamines, and we are just hoping that she has many years of pain free walking and living ahead. I gave up one of my new studios (the one downtown), and picked up another class at my studio out here. My schedule is still a work in progress, but I'm making it work.
At the beginning of November, my sister* and her wife arrived here in Denver... for good! They live in the building next to ours, and it has been so amazing having them here. They came over for Thanksgiving (masks always when not eating... they ate on the porch, we ate inside), and it was so so wonderful. I have missed having family close, and this is a blessing beyond measure right now.
[*my sister is trans, and they are now public, so I'm excited to share; her name is Ffion, and she is the best sister I could ever have. Positive comments only, thanks!]
I'm not sure what else to share at the moment. We are plugging along, in this weird new world... not doing much, but so busy all at the same time. I feel like Gwen's assistant some days (m'am, you have two zoom meetings this morning, and zoom school this afternoon), and like I am always with her, but we are making it work. Today was the first day of the new vaccine here in the United States, and while its going to be a while before we can all get it, its a little, much needed ray of hope. Maybe this summer I'll actually be able to see my parents!
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| We got a new couch! |
I'll try to update more often, but in the meantime, sending love and solidarity.
