great things take time

Change has been brewing in my life for a while. Nothing I can really share yet (thought hopefully soon! I really want to share!), but big things that have been taking up a lot of my time, energy, thoughts for the past few months; but even moreso for the last few weeks. They are ramping up and it is exciting. Also a little scary! Lol. Change, even for good, can be scary.

There are also a few other things that are less big in the grand scheme of things, but still big to me, that I'm trying to get the ball rolling on. Its hard, and things haven't been going quite as planned so far, but we will see what happens. Either way, expect some changes and announcements here early in the new year.

I'm finding this time equal parts exhilarating and draining. Since I turned 30, I feel like my desire to find what makes me happiest, what makes me feel complete, and what makes me feel like I'm doing big things has grown exponentially. 30 feels better then my 20s in some ways: I care so much less about what people think of me, and so much more about the kind of person I am in my daughter's eyes and the legacy I will be leaving for her. I feel more settled in some ways, and less in others. I'm not exactly where I thought I would be at 30, but at the same time, parts of my life are so much better then I thought they could be.

Humans in general, I think, are all just trying to do great things in our life. What those great things are, look different for everyone, but we want those great things nonetheless. I'm no exception, and lately my drive to do something spectacular has only grown. I have to remind myself over and over that great things take time. They don't happen in a day. In the same vein, sometimes great things aren't big. I don't have to change the world to make a difference, and sometimes the smallest things can have just as big an impact in the life of someone I love.

I'm looking at the end of 2013 as a chance to try to formulate and embrace some of these pursuits. To make things happen, I need to find a way to put to words what is currently just a confluence of emotions, ideas, and gut feelings dancing through my head as I try to fall asleep at night. These month can be my chance to set the stage, to help me shape 2014 into the year of growth, of realization, of coming into myself.

There will be some growing pains, I'm sure. But I'm excited. I hope you'll stick with me. I hope you'll be honest with me, and remind me that Rome wasn't built in a day. I hope you'll enjoy the journey.

Here's to great and exciting things.