running through my mind

I woke up this morning with bags under my eyes so big, that if I wanted to get on a plane, I would have had to check them. Teething, damn you, damn you to the bowels of hell.

Gwen is a whirlwind. She's getting so big right before my eyes. She's been putting two-work phrases together for a while now, but recently I've noticed her doing it a lot. And in more unexpected ways (pointing to my glass of milk, "mama milk!"... pointing to her sippy of water, "my water! my water!"... waving to the neighbor, "hi Joe!"... and no, the exclamation points aren't excessive here, girl often speaks in exclamations!).

Those teeth though are killing us, because she's waking more at night and is therefore more cranky during the day; when she had been sleeping so so wonderfully. Following all the craziness of the end of summer, I wanted to give her time to settle-in before re-visiting the idea of night weaning. Well she settled in so nicely that for a while she was going to bed and sleeping straight until 5 when she would come to bed with us! It was wonderful, and I was so happy that she did it on her own. Now, teeth. Urgh.

And the crankiness because of it, sheesh. Girl comes home and instead of my excited, "Mama!" ::runs to me, hugs and kisses::  Now she sees me, bursts into tears and wails "MaaaaaaaaaaMaaaaaaaaaaaa" until I pick her up and comfort her. Its all just too much for her at the moment. We have been trying to get her to bed a little earlier, but the crankiness means everything takes longer too... rinse and repeat.

I would really love for something to give. The completely emotional, non-logical side of me says, "do less of that work thing;" but obviously that's not realistic. I think life with a toddler kid is always a little overwhelming though, right? Now its because of early bedtimes, budding independence making everything a drawn out process, and things like teething. Next it will be more independence struggles, extra activities; then homework and playdates and more extracurricular activities; etc etc. I guess there is always something that will make it seem like their aren't enough hours in the day. I just have to figure out what I can do a little less of right now, so that I can do more of that cuddling my baby thing.

She really is so dang cute.

I guess I really just want to do all those average parent things, in an extraordinary way... and not feel like I'm half-assing everything. Though I keep reminding myself that Gwen doesn't expect me to be perfect, she just wants me to be there, act like a kid with her, playing on the floor and reading to her and having fun together. (Read a great article about this somewhere, and wish I could find it to 1.re-read and 2.link to. It mentioned having a mom with similar views around to talk to and be your motivator to find your balance... man do I wish that E lived closer, she's totally my Momsperation!)

House stuff is going well... we're moving along so nicely. I keep meaning to take some pictures to show you a before and after, but see the above for why I keep forgetting! Pictures aren't up on the walls yet, but once those are there I hope to do a "house tour." Definitely by the 22nd, since that's when we're having some people over.

Next weekend we scheduled a "don't plan anything" weekend... so we can have time together as a family, time to work on the house, and time to relax. Thank goodness.

I still have so much to write... but its time to get back to work and this is certainly long enough. Much more soon.